Chapter 273: Chapter 268 Mourning
Feng Shu clutched her aching lower abdomen in anger. Ever since she became pregnant, she had suffered immense mental strain, her emotions spiraling out of control, and her lower abdomen had been in discomfort for several days. Zhang Lingzheng had her take pills made from the fetal-protection medicine, but their efficacy was not as good as the decoction. Feng Shu tried her best to stay calm, yet she could never sleep soundly. Every time she closed her eyes, she dreamed of the scene where Xie Zhang was struck by a thousand arrows—his heart pierced and his life ended. The vision tore through her heart with excruciating pain. Zhang Lingzheng advised her not to worry excessively, warning that she already showed signs of miscarriage even though it had only been half a month since she conceived. Feng Shu tried to keep a balanced mindset, but every moment she spent in the palace, every time she saw Yuwen Jing, all she could think of was how Xie Zhang had died. That scene was burned into her mind and refused to fade.
"Xie Zhang and I were married through proper channels of matchmaking and ceremonial rites. We bowed to the heavens and our elders. We are husband and wife by law and propriety. No matter how others deny it, he is my rightful husband!" Feng Shu spoke calmly. She knew in her heart that if she wanted to leave the palace, she had to endure and not openly oppose Yuwen Jing.
But how could she resign herself to this? She had married in an upright and honorable manner—why should she be forced to deny it?
"Shu’er, do you really think angering me will do you any good?" Yuwen Jing’s face was shadowed with gloom. He looked at how Feng Shu had grown increasingly thin and felt a pang of discomfort in his heart. If it weren’t for Xie Zhang, he and Shu’er surely would have been a perfect pair, destined for one another.
"I am not trying to anger you; I am merely stating the truth."
"This is the only condition for leaving the palace. If you do not agree, then there is no need for you to leave."
"Fine, I agree!" Feng Shu sneered coldly. "My days in the palace—every moment—is unbearable. I only want to leave the Imperial Palace and go to Xiangguo Temple to mourn my late husband in peace. In my heart, he will always be my husband, and that is enough for me. Whatever the people of the world recognize or don’t recognize—what does that matter to me?"
"Shu’er, must you speak to me like this?" Yuwen Jing murmured. "We were once childhood sweethearts. We even had some happy times together."
"I have long forgotten," Feng Shu thought bitterly. The greatest regret of her life was ever meeting Yuwen Jing. Back in Ningzhou, she should have stayed far, far away from him. Having him fall for her was nothing but a curse brought by eight generations of bad luck.
Yuwen Jing’s face turned ashen, his dark circles evident. His already delicate and somewhat sinister features grew even more horrifyingly ghastly. Yet he forcibly restrained himself. "Xie Zhang is dead, riddled by arrows, never to come back to life. No matter how much you love him, he is nothing but a corpse now!"
Feng Shu’s lower abdomen again throbbed with pain. Cold sweat seeped from her forehead as she collapsed into the chair, reminding herself repeatedly not to lose her temper—not to lose her temper.
The child...the child was important!
Seeing her so distraught, Yuwen Jing felt jealousy, humiliation, and—a shameful, hidden satisfaction. "Shu’er, let us torment each other for a lifetime. I have all the time in the world to drag this out with you," he said.
Feng Shu closed her eyes, refusing to exchange a single word more with him.
Yuwen Jing ordered the Jinyi Guard to escort Feng Shu back to the Feng Mansion to bid farewell to Feng Changqing and Su Yuejiao. Since her wedding had turned into a disaster, Old Mrs. Feng had been bedridden, and the Feng Family had shut their doors to visitors. Feng Changqing had already resigned from his position as National General. The Marquis An Yuan and his wife had braved the backlash of gossip and career risks to visit them, but all they could do was lament the unpredictability of life’s tragedies. No one had expected such a tragic turn of events. The only comfort anyone could take was that Fengyu had left the capital.
Feng Changqing and Su Yuejiao had the foresight to send Fengyu out of the Capital City not long after Yuwen Jing ascended the throne, as he had come to the Feng Mansion to demand her. He knew that Fengyu was the best pawn to control Feng Shu, but fortunately, they had acted swiftly and sent Fengyu away in time.
Old Mrs. Feng and Feng Shu clung to each other and wept bitterly. Feng Shu dared not indulge too deeply in grief. She had kept her pregnancy a tightly guarded secret, known only to Xia Zhu, Dongxue, and Zhang Lingzheng. She intended not to tell even her family. This visit home was to say goodbye—she was leaving for Xiangguo Temple to observe mourning for Xie Zhang for a year.
"And after a year?" Su Yuejiao asked anxiously. "Do you think he will let you go?"
"I’ll take it one step at a time."
She just wanted to quietly give birth to the child, then send the baby to Ningzhou to grow up by Xie Jue and Xie Xun’s side. If Yuwen Jing discovered this, there would be no escape. She needed to secure the cooperation of those at Xiangguo Temple, pacify Yuwen Jing, convince him to withdraw the Jinyi Guard, and ensure he didn’t visit Xiangguo Temple for a year. Otherwise, there would be no way to conceal her pregnancy. Feng Shu dared not think too far ahead.
Old Mrs. Feng’s health was like a flickering oil lamp about to extinguish. Feng Shu was devastated. When they were alone, she couldn’t help but guide her grandmother’s hand to her lower abdomen, saying, "Grandmother, please take care of yourself. Next spring, your little great-grandchild will be waiting for you to hold him."
The old woman’s face lit with joy as tears streamed down. Seeing Feng Shu nod firmly, Old Mrs. Feng embraced her tightly. "You’ve suffered so much, Shu’er."
Her husband was newly deceased, and now she had to evade Yuwen Jing while carrying his posthumous child—one misstep and both lives would be lost. Back when the engagement was announced, everyone had proclaimed that the second granddaughter of the Feng Family was blessed to marry the Eldest Young Master of the Xie Family. But how quickly people forgot that glory must be matched by resilience in the face of humiliation.
"It’s not suffering," Feng Shu said, wiping her grandmother’s tears. "As long as my brother has some bloodline left in this world, I am already content."
"All things are predestined; none can escape fate," the old woman said, caressing her face. "Shu’er, life is often fraught with disappointments—nine times out of ten, things will not go our way. But after sorrow, you must pick yourself up. You’re still young, with a long road ahead. When the chance comes, flee—run as far as you can. Your father, your mother, and I will likely leave this world before you. Don’t let us become your burden."
"How could you be a burden?" Feng Shu’s heart shattered. Did her grandmother already sense something? She said, "Even when I turn eighty, I will still want Grandmother by my side."
"Then I’d be nothing but an old monster."
"Monster or not, Fengyu and I wouldn’t fear you."
Old Mrs. Feng wept and laughed. Feng Changlin and the First Lady, as well as Feng Ling, avoided her. Who knew whether it was to avoid suspicion or out of anger? Feng Changqing and Su Yuejiao were determined to rescue the Marquis Mansion, dragging the entire family into peril. The brothers of the Feng Family now harbored grudges against each other. Feng Shu did not press matters. As the sun set, she departed the city for Xiangguo Temple.
Dongxue lowered her voice and said, "My lady, Chen Lin reported that the Second Young Master’s Shadow Guards are nearby and asked you to be prepared. They plan to take you away from the Capital City in three days."
Feng Shu closed her eyes and gently shook her head. "Tell Chen Lin—I will not leave!"
"Why not?" Xia Zhu asked anxiously. "If not for your own sake, think of the young master. What if the Emperor suddenly visits Xiangguo Temple—how could we possibly conceal the truth?"
Before Feng Shu left the palace, the Empress saw her off with a single remark: Stay at Xiangguo Temple in peace; the Emperor will scarcely have the time to seek you out.
Feng Shu wondered whether the Empress knew something but could not discern her stance. Her words were opaque and vague.
Even so, she refused to leave with Xie Jue’s Shadow Guards.
Yuwen Jing must have allowed her to leave the palace intentionally, with the aim of capturing all those seeking to rescue her in one fell swoop. Xie Jue and Xie Xun had left in haste, without enough manpower in the Capital City, much less enough to safely extract her. If they attempted, they would be torn apart by the Jinyi Guard. Moreover, if she left, what would happen to her grandmother and her parents?
She couldn’t let Xie Jue and Xie Xun know about her pregnancy.
If they found out, the brothers would stop at nothing to take her away. Considering that Zhang Lingzheng might pass information to Xie Jue, she had already warned him not to reveal her condition under any circumstances.
All Feng Shu prayed for was Fengyu’s safety. So long as Fengyu stayed away from the Capital and avoided capture by Yuwen Jing, she could quietly await childbirth at Xiangguo Temple. Everyone at the temple, from the abbot to the young novices, were trusted acquaintances of Feng Shu and Fengyu, so it wouldn’t be hard to conceal the pregnancy.
The road home was impassable; the path ahead treacherous. Feng Shu cradled her belly. From this moment onward, she would walk this road alone, and she would never...ever forgive Yuwen Jing!