Chapter 211: Regrets And Soft Breeze
Lydia was still crying at the stairs. The soft carpet beneath her knees had already grown damp from her tears, but she did not notice it. She sat curled into herself, one hand gripping the banister as if holding onto it would stop her from falling apart. She knew Ivan had long gone. She had heard the sound of his heavy steps fade into silence, the echo of the doors closing behind him. The moment she realized he was truly gone, something inside her cracked even deeper.
The pain only grew worse. Her chest ached as though someone had pressed a stone upon her heart, refusing to let it breathe. She kept whispering to herself to stop, to gather her strength, to not cry anymore. But the tears refused to listen. They slid down her cheeks without mercy, hot and endless, burning her skin like fire.
Her whole body trembled from the force of her sobs. Her lips kept moving, forming words she could not even understand. A mixture of prayers, pleas, and broken whispers. She hated herself for being so weak. She hated the loneliness pressing down on her even more.
Immediately, Anna came rushing to her side. She must have been looking for her. Her shoes tapped quickly against the marble floor as she hurried down the stairs. She bent beside Lydia and said softly, "Your Highness, I’m here."
Lydia tried to compose herself, tried to swallow her sobs and raise her head with dignity. But the pain would not let her. Her whole face was swollen with tears, her eyes red, her lips trembling. She opened her mouth and forced out words that barely had strength.
"I’m fine. Please... leave."
Anna’s eyes softened. She could see Lydia trembling, her body weak and fragile. She reached out gently, her voice calm and steady, like a mother soothing her child. "I’m here for you, Your Highness. You don’t have to hold it in."
But Lydia did not want comfort. Anna’s words touched her heart, but she could not bear them. She did not want pity. She did not want anyone to see her like this. She quickly wiped her face with the back of her hand, smearing the traces of tears but never truly hiding them. She forced her shoulders back, lifted her chin, and dragged her weak legs forward.
Each step felt heavy, as if her body no longer belonged to her. She barely managed to stand. She walked slowly away from the stairs, heading towards the Grand Duchess’s quarters, trying to look strong even as her insides crumbled.
Anna followed her, her steps soft and hesitant, her voice low with worry. "Your Highness..."
But before Lydia could respond, something strange struck her.
First, it was a ringing in her ears. A sharp, high sound, like a thousand tiny bells clanging all at once. She stopped in her tracks, pressing her hands against her head. The walls seemed to sway.
Then dizziness rushed over her, so sudden and violent she felt as though the whole palace floor had dropped beneath her feet. Her vision blurred. Her lips parted in shock.
And then, everything went black.
Her body collapsed like a doll with its strings cut, falling hard onto the cold floor.
"Your Highness!" Anna cried in panic, rushing forward. She fell to her knees beside her and shook her gently. "Wake up! Please, open your eyes!"
Just then, Boris was returning to his room. He heard Anna’s desperate cries and hurried forward. His eyes widened when he saw Lydia lying unconscious on the ground.
"What happened, Anna?" he asked sharply, his voice tight with fear.
Anna looked up at him, her face pale. "I don’t know. She was walking, and then... she just collapsed."
Without wasting another second, Boris bent down and lifted Lydia into his arms. She was so light, her head falling limply against his shoulder, her face pale as snow.
"Quickly," he said. "We’ll take her to her room."
The two of them rushed through the corridors, their footsteps echoing. On their way, they were spotted by Xenia, who was startled at the sight.
"What happened? What happened to Her Highness?" she asked, her voice rising.
"There is d no time," Boris answered quickly. "Go fetch a physician. Now."
Xenia’s face went pale. She nodded and ran down the hall.
Boris’s grip on Lydia tightened as he carried her, his heart pounding. He glanced at her face, so still, so lifeless. A fear he could not name took over him. He had seen her strong. He had seen her bold. Never had he seen her like this.
Inside the room, Boris laid her gently on the bed. Anna rushed to her side and held Lydia’s hand, her voice breaking.
"Please be okay. Please be okay z Highness," Anna whispered, tears gathering in her eyes. She shook Lydia’s cold hand softly, begging her to respond.
Boris turned immediately, his jaw set. "I’ll go get His Highness. Stay with her until the physician comes."
Anna nodded quickly, holding onto Lydia as though she could bring her back with sheer will.
Boris rushed out of the room, his boots hitting the floor hard. He searched the palace with desperation. He looked through Ivan’s chambers, but they were empty. The study was silent. The halls, the gardens, every corner—nothing. Ivan was gone.
A sharp fear ran through Boris. He hurried to the stables, praying he was wrong. But when he arrived, his heart sank. Ivan’s horse was missing.
Ivan was not in the palace.
Far away through the capital streets, Ivan was out riding. His cloak flew behind him as the horse galloped through the warm air. His thoughts were crashing down on him, one after the other, like waves breaking against rocks. He could not stay in the palace any longer. The walls had been closing in on him. His chest had felt tight, suffocating.
He thought if he rode far enough, he would breathe. But the truth mocked him. Even on horseback, even with the wind cutting across his face, he felt no relief. His heart beat heavy, his mind drowning in confusion and regret. He was running, but the suffocation followed him everywhere.
Back in Lydia’s room, Xenia had returned with the physician. He rushed to the bedside and sat down beside Lydia, his tools already in hand. He pressed his fingers against her wrist, checking her pulse. His face grew serious.
Outside, Katherine noticed Boris returning with a worried expression. She hurried to him, her voice trembling. "Is everything alright, Boris?"
He shook his head. "No. It’s Her Highness. She... Her... Her Highness fainted."
Katherine froze. "What?"
"I went to find His Highness. To inform him. But I can’t find him," Boris continued. His voice was low, urgent. "I searched everywhere. He’s not in the palace. I don’t know."
Katherine’s lips parted. Fear struck her like ice. "What about Her Highness? Is she okay?"
"I don’t know. I don’t know what happened. But no worries. The physician should be there by now," Boris said.
The moment Katherine heard the word "physician," her body stiffened. Her blood seemed to run cold. Her hands shook slightly as she muttered under her breath. "No. No... it can’t be."
Inside the room, the physician leaned closer, studying Lydia carefully. He pressed his hand lightly against her stomach, then checked her pulse again, his brows pulling together. His face shifted suddenly, his expression shocked.
He exhaled sharply and whispered, almost in disbelief, "She’s..."
His words broke off, but his eyes were wide.
The tension in the air grew heavy, as though the whole palace itself was holding its breath.